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I Can’t Take It All

by Jackie

What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 27
What’s your race/ethnicity? Black
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? New York City
Highest education received: Some college (not currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Teacher
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 50+
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? None

I Can’t Take It All

How long ago did this hookup happen? 20 mins ago

What was your relationship status at the time? In a relationship (monogamous)

How would you best classify this hookup? Sex with an ex

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For more than 3 years

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I’ve known D since we were lids we grew up in the sane town and I’ve had a crush on him my whole life. We dated shortly when I was 16 but it just didn’t work out. Shortly after that D went into the army and that’s when we would write each other and we fell hard in love. We were always in the wrong place at the wrong time and could never have a real relationship.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I moved back to my hometown and bumped into D at the grocery store
It was weird because after all those years he was still the mist beautiful man I’ve ever laid my eyes on. All he had to do was lick his lips and I was in love again. He looked me up on social media and we began to talk almost every day. Reminiscing about old times..it was great! We also began talking about how we both wished we could have one more time to be together sexually because he still had the biggest dick I have ever seen and he thought it had the nicest ass he had ever seen. We started sending nasty pics and videos and then I invited him over to my place to hang out.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We started on the couch watching a movie, talking and teasing each other. Then he came over to my side of the couch and put himself under me and we cuddled. I was so nervous. Felt like a teenager again with the cutest guy rubbing my leg. I laid down and he got on top of my and started kissing me and I bit his lip I wanted him so bad. He then started rubbing my pussy over my yoga pants (which I wore on purpose because he loves my ass). He then started taking my pants off, rubbing my clit and fingering me faster and faster every stroke. I was DRIPPING and gushing all over his hand. I couldn’t even get a hold of myself. He then took off his pants and his big dick hang so low. I had forgotten how big he actually was. He got on top and put his dick in and I couldn’t even take it all. He is so long he was in my stomach and I was grabbing his shirt because it hurt so good! He flipped me over and started fucking me doggy and I had to reach my hand behind me because I couldn’t take his long dick! I was moaning so loud and then I said “I can’t take it all”! He whispered in my ear with the sexiest voice “take it all”. Just that relaxed me and made me cum. I started thrusting back on his dick and fucking him. He grabbed my ass so tight and came!

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I know that nothing can come of this. I feel bad that I cheated..its just a complicated situation.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s)

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? A little bit

Why do you regret this hookup? Just because I cheated and D and I have such history I don’t want to fall back in love with him

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Honestly just connecting with D again…it’s been years

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Idk

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Somewhat positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? No

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I love the casual sex project. Since I’m not able to tell anybody about this hook up its nice to vent

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